believe

sometimes thoughts and feelings are hard to express but in certain cases musical pieces may aid in expressing them... this is a song that i'd like to share for now...

If I Believed

By Patti Austin

If I believed in paradise

I'd swear I must be there

I'd swear I must be there right now with you

If I believed in miracles

I'd know that one was happening to me

But if I don't believe in paradise

Then miracles aren't real

Then someone tell me what is this I feel

I wanna believe it's love this time

I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie

But with you I can't deny

If I believed in paradise

I'd swear I'm there

If I believed in magic spells

It all would be so clear

'Cause magic spells must have brought you here

If I could see the future

I'd see if you and I were meant to be

But I dont know any magic

And tomorrow's just a dream

But something in this fantasy is real

I wanna believe it's love this time

I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie

I wanna believe it's love this time

I wanna believe my heart's not telling me a lie

But with you I cant deny

If I believed in paradise

I'd swear I'm there

I'm there

I'm there

If I believed.

birthday

I don't know if you remember the picture but to give you a clue... the wall behind you isn't there anymore... anyway happy birthday twinlet... take good care of yourself... and I always wish you the best... it's my blog's birthday too... it has been one good year of writing and pouring my heart out... I'm hoping for more years to share my thoughts and feelings in this blog...

reality

often times i catch myself lost in my thoughts... always thinking hard and always thinking of possible scenarios and situations... i end up with with so many different assumptions... most of which will never come true but at least one scenario becomes the most logical and rational one... you'll start believing in it so much that everything that supports it is consumed and makes the thought stronger... it will also reject anything that opposes it... it becomes alive... it becomes close to reality for a person... but this is where the line is drawn... thoughts will always remain as thoughts until it actually happens... one cannot think of reality... one can only conceptualize... trying to capture it would be trying to successfully cup water using your hands without wasting a drop... something always escapes no matter how good a person is... this is something basic and can even be relearned without philo... the limitation it has set has to be considered... closing the mind is one danger that should be avoided... it can affect so many things... as well as outcomes... being too serious can be a setback... instead of looking at what is real... it remains only at the level of what is perceived as real... it can also be seen as a way to escape reality... to run away from it... but i guess the good thing about reality is that it has its on way of checking up on you... you never know but life can hold many surprises... far too many to even think of... just there for you to experience...

instinct

it took me quite a while before i finally decided to write this post... instinct told me that i somehow should... funny thing is that i don't even know why... it does however make me wonder where instinct comes from... most often than not it is supposed to come from what is natural... or what is felt as appropriate for the moment... it also a reaction to something or at least trying to react to something... however is it what is usually chosen... people use the phrase follow your instinct thereby disarming the rational processes of the mind and completely subjecting it to that of the "gut"... what stirs from within and slowly moves outward as action... but of course this is not usually the case... as the mind is still able to control these sudden movements and prevents the person from making a mistake or doing what is right... going back to the argument that instinct is what is natural... shouldn't it be rational to say that following it would bring order... but of course this presupposes that there is order in nature or what we call natural... however it can be said that the mind is what organizes things... makes things rational... makes it orderly... therefore instinct which shuts it off brings chaos... the problem lies now in what we perceive or think as orderly... it could be possible that both instinct and mind could create order... it is a matter of how we define or probably not define order... definitions themselves are subject to this argument... are they here to help or probably here to cause more disorder... so now do you let instinct or mind decide the answer...

almost forgot... belated happy birthday to jerome...aug 8...can't believe i've known you since kinder... and to hannah... aug 9... the newest twinlet added haha...